But if you want to get more of it it’d be pretty useful to have an idea of what people with great personal impact actually do, wouldn’t it? Well here, without varnish, is the answer to that question from my personal and professional point of view. People with great personal impact have-
- Energy- in the right place
- Empathy- for the other people in the room
- Emotional connection- they know how they feel about things
All very vague and high level for the moment but stick with me and imagine that you’re waiting to meet someone for the first time. What would make a positive impact on you?
Let’s think that you’ve registered with a new dentist in your town and you go for your first appointment and you walk in through the door, a little nervous. You’re greeted by the back of someone’s head. He says, sit in the chair would you? Open wide, OK- and then starts barking tooth names and numbers to his invisible (to you) assistant. How’re you feeling now?
Where was the dentist’s energy? Focused on himself. Where was the empathy for how it was, in that moment, to be you? Nowhere. Where was the emotional connection with this busy professional? Nowhere once again.
I accept that what’s important here is that the guy is a great dentist. We’d all prefer pain free, quality treatment with no charisma, over falling in love and having your teeth fall out 2 weeks later; but given equal skill, most of us would choose a professional that was warm, focused on us and in control of themselves, wouldn’t we?
Human beings need love, concern and care, and our assessment of all of the people we meet starts with a lighting assessment of whether the other person is interested in us at all. If he’s not , then we may listen but we probably won’t believe.